Giving Up a Baby for Adoption and Positive Adoption Language

A lot of women reach our counselors after entering the phrase “how to give up my baby for adoption” into a search engine. We understand the feelings connected with that phrase. But we want you to promise you one thing: adoption is not giving up.

Talking about adoption using positive language is important. Positive adoption language helps us understand adoption as a lifelong agreement between birth parents, adoptive parents and children who are adopted at birth. We support pregnant women considering adoption by using positive adoption language in all conversations. Here’s how positive adoption language works.

Instead of saying “giving up my baby for adoption”, we like to say “making an adoption plan for my baby”. If you’re pregnant and thinking about adoption, you’re in charge of what happens every step of the way. Making an adoption plan is different for everyone, but might include steps like choosing the family to adopt your child, meeting them before your baby is born, and arranging regular contact with the adoptive family in the form of an open adoption after your baby is born. Using positive adoption language helps us to reframe this conversation away from “giving up your baby” to thinking about steps in the adoption process that you control.

Other ways that positive adoption language may help guide this conversation away from “giving up your baby for adoption” include understanding your role in the process from the very beginning. If you’re just beginning to explore the possibility of making an adoption plan for your baby, we will avoid referring to you as a birthparent. At this point, it’s important for you to understand that we recognize your option and ability to parent your baby. Our counselors are here to support your choices moving forward, and to provide you with the resources your family needs to succeed.

Remember this: adoption is not giving up.

If you would like more information about making an adoption plan for your baby, contact us whenever you’re ready.