Way more people are in therapy than you think.
Many of us resist the idea of going to see a professional counselor, therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist because we assume that “normal” people don’t need to talk to a professional about how they are feeling – but nothing could be further from the truth.
In fact, a recent poll showed that more than one in every four adults had gotten counseling in the past two years. To put that in context, consider this: only one in five Americans has a tattoo. You read that correctly: therapy is more common than getting a tattoo.
Susan Cahill once said, “Life isn’t easy for most people,” and she’s right. Millions of us have, at some time, gotten to the point where our emotions just feel like more than we can handle. And while grief and sadness are normal parts of the adoption process for birth parents, if months have passed and you’re still not feeling like yourself, it might be a good idea to seek professional help. Here is a list of signs that it may be that time.
- You feel sad or worried most of the time.
- You are angrier and more irritable than usual.
- You can’t stop thinking about things that upset you, like the adoption.
- You have negative feelings about yourself, like that you are worthless or a bad person.
- You aren’t interested in doing any of the things you used to enjoy.
- The steps you would normally take to make yourself feel better aren’t working.
- Your performance at work or school has gotten worse.
- Your behavior has led your friends and family members to start acting differently towards you.
- You get unexplainable headaches or stomachaches or find that you’re getting sick all the time.
- You are abusing drugs or alcohol to help you feel better.
Walking into a counselor’s office can feel scary; you might feel embarrassed about needing to be there, or worried that you’ll be judged harshly for decisions you’ve made. But remember that the person in the chair across from you chose this job because they want to help people who are having a tough time. They’ve talked to all sorts of individuals with all sorts of problems. They don’t believe there is anything crazy about needing to talk to someone– so why should you?
Making an adoption plan can knock you off kilter for a bit. But we’ve seen many folks in your position successfully work through their feelings, even when those feelings seemed completely overwhelming to at first. You deserve to be happy, and if you’re having a hard time getting there, then we hope you’ll reach out to get the support you need. If you’re not sure where to find a therapist, give us a call and we’ll help connect you. Because hey, if Halle Berry can do it, then so can you.