Guest Post: Not A Day Goes By

Sheron posted this as a comment to a previous post, but we thought her story was so important that it needed its own blog post.

Hello, I wanted to share my experience about adoption. I have a 13 year old daughter that was given up for adoption, and it hurts everyday. People say get over it, but how the heck can you get over something so dear to your heart?

I was raised in foster care, and my father sexually molested me at age 18 — yeah, it can happen. I thought I would go crazy when my foster mom suggested adoption, but it changed my world. There is not a day that goes by that I do not wonder how in the world is my daughter doing and is she being raised in a good home. Unfortunately, I did not have the privilege of choosing a home. They took her from me after just a week out of the hospital. Then I spent two weeks in a psychiatric ward trying to figure out what happened. But I have had to live with the ridicule of my family — one, for turning the cheek when I told them my daughter belonged to my father, who passed away Christmas Eve last year in 2007. I had to stay by his bedside to tell him the hurt he put me through. Does anybody know what that feels like?

I do have a son that is now 7 years of age, and I feel like I am terrific mom to him. I await the day to see my baby girl, and I hope she receives me too. The adoption agency gave me this website to write out how I feel and to hope someone out there could give me some inspiration or to share their story if they have their child home now. My little girl will be of age soon, and I would like to bond with her and form a mother/daughter relationship with her. I’m hoping she wants one with me. Does anybody understand? These years have not been peaches and cream, and it took years before god blessed me with another baby. Sometimes I think he punished me from having children, but now I realize he just wanted my mind back in the right place. I wasn’t on drugs nor did I drink, I just needed to let the devil out of my heart and let God do his magic, but the pain will always be there. I miss her so much. The only thing I have to hold on to is my memories, and they are not the greatest.

Well, the agency is sending me an update. Hopefully, I will write back and let you know how it goes. Pray though, I always know that God does hear us. When the time is right, bam, watch the miracles happen. I know he hears me. I want my little girl back.

One Response to “Guest Post: Not A Day Goes By”

  1. Sheron, Thanks so much for sharing this with us. It sounds like you’ve had a lot going on for a long time. You’ve had to be so strong! I hope it helps to let things out a bit. Have you had the chance to really talk to someone about everything that has happened?

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